(I forgot to blog yesterday. Feel free to blame chemo brain, fibro fog or whatever.)
I just learned about some new research which has lead to the use of mutation tracking in the blood of patients previously treated for breast cancer. They look for DNA mutations to detection recurrence months before anything would be detectable through scans.
This makes a lot of sense to me. Why can't cancer be detected in DNA or some other way long before it can be found in a scan? Wouldn't it be wonderful to just go for an annual blood test or something that told you if you had cancer developing? Not to get ahead of myself but I am all for this.
I like this kind of progress. It actually seems that doctors are beginning to use it.
Nov 18, 2019
Nov 12, 2019
Deep thoughts in the middle of the night
Insomnia, partly caused by fibromyalgia which gives me fatigue and insomnia, causes deep thoughts in the middle of the night. Sometimes I actually remember these thoughts to ponder them further.
So what occurred to me last night was that my most significant health issues to me is no longer cancer. Cancer has definitely settled back to lurk but no longer dominates my life. I get to go to extra doctors, because of my medical history, we need to be sure, but cancer is not the focus. This is nice mind set. I don't have the need to dwell on it in the middle of the night. Nor do I feel the need to dwell on it. Cancer is not worthy of any stress.
Back in July I saw my medical oncologist for my annual follow up. She took me off Femara after five years. The thought process was that Femara has not been shown to have additional benefit after five years and it could be contributing to my joint pains. But she said I could restart it if I felt stressed about potential recurrence. I didn't think that would be a problem and I am not stressed. And I might have less joint pains than before.
Also my thyroid cancer has not been problematic. Its just there and I have extra blood work because of it. But its not a stressor.
However my rheumatoid and fibromyalgia tend to rule my life. If I bend wrong or spend too long out and about, they remind me they are there. Or I can not be doing anything and they tell me they rule my body. And fibro keeps me up at night.
Something is going to do me in at some point but I am not going to worry about it. Cancer doesn't deserve to stress me out. It doesn't deserve anything. Its just a piece of crap anyway. I am not going to waste my life worrying about cancer any more than I already have.
Maybe I'll get a good night's sleep tonight.
So what occurred to me last night was that my most significant health issues to me is no longer cancer. Cancer has definitely settled back to lurk but no longer dominates my life. I get to go to extra doctors, because of my medical history, we need to be sure, but cancer is not the focus. This is nice mind set. I don't have the need to dwell on it in the middle of the night. Nor do I feel the need to dwell on it. Cancer is not worthy of any stress.
Back in July I saw my medical oncologist for my annual follow up. She took me off Femara after five years. The thought process was that Femara has not been shown to have additional benefit after five years and it could be contributing to my joint pains. But she said I could restart it if I felt stressed about potential recurrence. I didn't think that would be a problem and I am not stressed. And I might have less joint pains than before.
Also my thyroid cancer has not been problematic. Its just there and I have extra blood work because of it. But its not a stressor.
However my rheumatoid and fibromyalgia tend to rule my life. If I bend wrong or spend too long out and about, they remind me they are there. Or I can not be doing anything and they tell me they rule my body. And fibro keeps me up at night.
Something is going to do me in at some point but I am not going to worry about it. Cancer doesn't deserve to stress me out. It doesn't deserve anything. Its just a piece of crap anyway. I am not going to waste my life worrying about cancer any more than I already have.
Maybe I'll get a good night's sleep tonight.
Nov 11, 2019
A little too personal for me
Now big pharma has another 'bright idea'. They want to use fitbits in clinical trials to get more details on the impact of the medication and if it is working. However that wouldn't work for me. So it would be another way I would be excluded from potential clinical trials.
I am never eligible for clinical trials now anyway. I have too many ailments to be considered. It would be very difficult to tell the impact of a new medication because I have so many others.
Also, I can't wear fit bits. I cant put anything on my left arm because of lymphedema. This means no watches, no bracelets, and only my wedding ring, when my arm is feeling okay. And a fitbit? Absolutely not. I have problems wearing anything on my right arm because of my tennis elbow/bad wrist/everything else that is going on. No watches, bracelets either (I carry my phone to use instead of a watch).
This article talks about a 'fitbit' that would work as an adhesive patch. I am allergic to so many things these days. Last week's pain patch left a raised area on my chest from the adhesive even though I have been using anti itch lotion to help heal it. I am probably not the only person with multiple medical issues who would have issues when wearing one of these.
Finally, I think a fitbit is a bit intrusive. Its my body and I am not sure how comfortable I feel with someone monitoring my body from afar. I would want to be the one monitoring the results and then forwarding them to the pharma company.
So a 'bright' idea by someone who is healthy.It might be easier for them, but not necessarily easier for the patients.
I am never eligible for clinical trials now anyway. I have too many ailments to be considered. It would be very difficult to tell the impact of a new medication because I have so many others.
Also, I can't wear fit bits. I cant put anything on my left arm because of lymphedema. This means no watches, no bracelets, and only my wedding ring, when my arm is feeling okay. And a fitbit? Absolutely not. I have problems wearing anything on my right arm because of my tennis elbow/bad wrist/everything else that is going on. No watches, bracelets either (I carry my phone to use instead of a watch).
This article talks about a 'fitbit' that would work as an adhesive patch. I am allergic to so many things these days. Last week's pain patch left a raised area on my chest from the adhesive even though I have been using anti itch lotion to help heal it. I am probably not the only person with multiple medical issues who would have issues when wearing one of these.
Finally, I think a fitbit is a bit intrusive. Its my body and I am not sure how comfortable I feel with someone monitoring my body from afar. I would want to be the one monitoring the results and then forwarding them to the pharma company.
So a 'bright' idea by someone who is healthy.It might be easier for them, but not necessarily easier for the patients.
Nov 5, 2019
When all else fails
Go to the beach.
Yes that is my plan for the day, or at least the morning. I could be doing a thousand other things, packing, moving stuff, grocery shopping, cleaning up, and many more. I could even have gone to work. But I am opting to go to the beach.
Why you ask? Because I want to and I can. And there is a limit to what I can do on a given day. And its a birthday present to myself. Yes today is my birthday (and I am 37 again if you must know).
Back in my 20s I worked for a company which gave all full time employees a paid floating holiday to take on the birthday. Since then, I have always avoided working on my birthday. And today's weather forecast is for an upper 80s perfect summer day and going to the beach is recommended. So I am taking their advice.
I will contemplate life as I gaze out at the ocean. That is my prescription for life at its best.
As my health goes down my appreciation for living longer improves and incentivizes me to stop and 'smell the roses' so to speak.
Yes that is my plan for the day, or at least the morning. I could be doing a thousand other things, packing, moving stuff, grocery shopping, cleaning up, and many more. I could even have gone to work. But I am opting to go to the beach.
Why you ask? Because I want to and I can. And there is a limit to what I can do on a given day. And its a birthday present to myself. Yes today is my birthday (and I am 37 again if you must know).
Back in my 20s I worked for a company which gave all full time employees a paid floating holiday to take on the birthday. Since then, I have always avoided working on my birthday. And today's weather forecast is for an upper 80s perfect summer day and going to the beach is recommended. So I am taking their advice.
I will contemplate life as I gaze out at the ocean. That is my prescription for life at its best.
As my health goes down my appreciation for living longer improves and incentivizes me to stop and 'smell the roses' so to speak.
Nov 4, 2019
What if...
What if we just said f*ck it all and pretended were healthy? We might need to take our meds but what if we just went back to the way we were when we were healthy? I could go skiing, hiking, travel more, be thinner, and, most importantly, be happier.
Last night a friend was going to call me to chat and I fell asleep before she called (just after 8pm). Then of course I was up in the middle of the night thinking more deep thoughts, while feeling all my aches and pains, of course.
So what if all of us with multiple ailments said 'I'm sick of being sick and am going to be healthy again and do all the things we want.' I would love to go hiking again. I climbed the Grand Canyon once so I'm good there but it might be nice to hike more in the Sierra Nevadas or Rockies where I haven't done much hiking. An adventure trip to Scandinavia sounds like a lot of fun as well. Or just stay up late enough to have a social life? Is this asking too much?
Right now my body would protest but I am tired of listening to it and want to say 'f*ck it all' and run away and join the circus.
All of us unhealthy people have inner healthy (skinny and younger) people trying to get out. I want to let that person out and have fun again.
Last night a friend was going to call me to chat and I fell asleep before she called (just after 8pm). Then of course I was up in the middle of the night thinking more deep thoughts, while feeling all my aches and pains, of course.
So what if all of us with multiple ailments said 'I'm sick of being sick and am going to be healthy again and do all the things we want.' I would love to go hiking again. I climbed the Grand Canyon once so I'm good there but it might be nice to hike more in the Sierra Nevadas or Rockies where I haven't done much hiking. An adventure trip to Scandinavia sounds like a lot of fun as well. Or just stay up late enough to have a social life? Is this asking too much?
Right now my body would protest but I am tired of listening to it and want to say 'f*ck it all' and run away and join the circus.
All of us unhealthy people have inner healthy (skinny and younger) people trying to get out. I want to let that person out and have fun again.