There's basil in my coffee and other worries

If there is one thing I have learned over the past eight years of health crap is to roll with the punches. I need to deal with what I can and learn to cope with the rest. I try to keep my life on an even keel as much as possible. I usually do unless 'something' happens.

I don't have the energy to go overboard at any little thing. I need to save my strength to cope with it all and not lose my sanity, or anything else important. Because I have no way of telling what could be next.

It has been more than eight years of medical crap. Ten years ago I had a hysterectomy and then 18 months later breast cancer and so much more since. But I think I am doing okay these days, although some may disagree.

My latest health aggravation is my knee. Not being a candidate for knee surgery has put a damper on my hopes for life without a knee brace. And my knee isn't bad enough so I could have a knee replacement - but I have always believed there is no reason to have one of those unless absolutely necessary. And Its not necessary. But I will whine bitch about it to my therapist and rheumatologist and see if any solutions come along. Or medical research comes up with a new way to fix it.

And life goes on. I will cope and move on.

This morning while making coffee way too early, I thought I grabbed the bag of mulling spices so I could throw a few in to the coffee grinder to add some flavor to the coffee. Nope, it was basil. I tried to pull most of it out but there is a hint of basil in it. But its not bad. I can deal with it.

More than one ailment

So I read the news, a lot. And probably I read too much news and especially health news - searching for the elusive cures. But in reading the news, I see lots of different opinions and announcements as one would expect.

Two things caught my eye this morning. One reminds us that breast cancer is not the main killer of women. Its heart disease. While we cover the world in little pink ribbons for breast cancer, we need to remember heart disease and other ailments are out there as well and that also kill people.

Another article I read is about a woman who blogs about life with fibromyalgia. I read the article and then thought for a few minutes (a dangerous proposition I know). Yes she is struggling with fibromyalgia. But there are people out there, like me, that have fibromyalgia and additional ailments. So those struggles with fibromyalgia are piled on top of issues with other ailments or issues.

When we are diagnosed with an ailment, it becomes the hyperfocus of our lives. But we need to realize that we are not the worst off, there are many others who have their own pile of problems, including poverty, mental illness, and more and are in much worse shape.

Imagine life with your pile of ailments and issues and compound it with additional ones such as poverty, lack of health insurance or transportation, isolation, or other issues.

I make myself sometimes peel off my layers of focus on my life and keep the awareness of others who are worse off.

Am I an expert at anything?

I can no longer work full time. I struggle to work 15 hours/week. But I don't have enough money. Cash is tight in our house. I mean I have savings in the bank but they are in nice safe IRAs so they will stay there and grow until I retire. Anyway, I am trying to come up with more ways to make money.

My first thought is I will promote my knitting and crocheting and be proactive and sell more. The more I sell, the more I can knit. This keeps me busy and out of trouble on days when I am not up to going to work. So I have added a new page to my blog which I will fill with more information and keep my Facebook page updated with pictures of my latest creations. I can take credit cards or checks (if I know you) and will ship in the US.

My second thought is perhaps I can sell my services as a cancer consultant and help people navigate the medical maze of a cancer diagnosis. So I am asking, for feedback here:

• Would you want a cancer consultant to help you with the medical maze and cancer roller coaster on where to find support and help locally to you?
• Would you pay for this? Either on the phone or in email? 
• What kinds of questions do you/did you have?

I have no medical experience so I would not provide any medical guidance. I am not a social worker so I am not providing emotional support. But I do think I can help people find local emotional resources and additional information on their cancer.

My background is two cancer diagnoses so I have walked the walk so I think I can talk the talk.

What do you think? Am I on to something here?

Why people stop blogging?

This morning I actually took a look at the back end of my blog and the list of blogs I follow. There was probably over 100. I went through the list and cleared out a bunch of them who either I am no longer interested in or are no longer blogging.

Obviously there are two reasons people stop blogging - either they just decide to stop or they are no longer with us, unfortunately. The second group are the ones that sadden me - lost friends.

But the first group intrigues me. Why do they stop blogging? Most of the blogs I follow are health related blogs, many of them on breast or thyroid cancer, arthritis, fibromyalgia, or other lifelong ailments. So why do these people stop blogging? Its not like they are cured. But maybe they think they are. Or maybe they no longer have coping issues?

This is why I am intrigued. I think of blogging as a coping/venting tool for many. That's what it is for me, after 8+ years of blogging. My health is constantly evolving with new issues cropping up periodically (but I really wouldn't mind if I didn't have any more issues thank you) so I keep coping and keep blogging. Do these other former bloggers non longer feel the need?

The emotional impact of an ailment may dim over time and perhaps they get a false sense of security and assume they will be fine or are able to work past it and get on with their lives. Or maybe I am just really jealous that they are better and I am not? Damn.